My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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