im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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