We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
