My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
