Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
