You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Dear god my vagina.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
