I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
