We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
