your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
