She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
