No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
