Non-Jews are for practice
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
