so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
