FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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