I heard we made out
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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