Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
