You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
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