I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Less talking, more tequila
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize