What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
