I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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