I don't think brook has ever known best
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
