Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
