Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
So vagazzling was a success
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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