I threw up into my coffee this morning.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
