Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
