ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
