i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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