Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
