Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I would fuck him just for his dog
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
