So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
