I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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