Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
