i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
