i don't like sucking hair
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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