We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
We were destined to go to rehab together
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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