i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize