You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Semen is not good for contacts.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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