I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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