he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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