I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize