oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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