Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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