Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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