Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
