I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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