You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
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