So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
