god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize