Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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