Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
